No, I didn't forget about you, blog. I've been avoiding you.

I begin with an idea of how I want to tell a story and then there's no room on the board and no matter how many times I swap tiles I end up with letters that only spell six points.

I used to write better. I used to write- period. Maybe I wasn't that good. Maybe that's not the point. I used to read what I had written and it was a close translation to my feelings. The posts I didn't write could fill a Top 100 / Best Of Engrish.com list for how poorly my emotions and thoughts were translated into the English language.

My blog. As if I own you. I don't. I have permission to post things until someone decides I don't any longer.

There are so many bite-sized stories that could fill only a paragraph. Then there is the list of things I'm cautious about putting online. I embarrassed my daughter last night and she called me a life-ruiner. I wanted to share something touching she did for someone and she buried herself in a blanket.

People (the proverbial "they") will tell you how fast time with a child goes by and to soak it all in as if you could put it in a bottle. I wish in some ways I could go back to when I had my tiny baby, but I'd only take more pictures and a ton of video. I don't want to go back. I like where we are now. Even if sometimes I don't want to be the grown-up.

I hate "what-ifs" as much as I hate bell peppers. Give me reality. Give me now. I'll get to the next part when it's time.

It's 12:47 a.m. and the anxiety has inflated and is seeping out into the air.

I acquiesce and almost run to take my 'Calm the freak down' pill (Xanex). But only half. I haven't taken it for a few days, and a whole pill may leave me too groggy to make it to class on time in the morning.

I can barely hold on to the names of my anxieties as I reach to calm them down or throw them far from the reach of my conscious mind.

I miss my dog.
I want another dog.
I can't really devote enough time or energy to a dog right now.

Why did it take me so long to realize Lucia could be dyslexic? Why did no one else notice?
What if she's not? How many tests are there available for learning disabilities?
When is the school going to test her?
Why haven't they tested her yet- it's been 24 hours!

Final projects are due next week. I'll miss my classmates- I'll have to work to keep in touch.

Too many bad habits.
Still too much fear.

So many good things, too.
Love my bed.

Until I find an awesome way to archive the gems that come from my child I'm posting some of them here to archive and make room for more.


"Mom, sometime will you show me some of your moves of water?" 07/09/09
↑ ↓

"Mom, I can hear your breathing from in between your boobs." 07/09/09
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"Holy guacamole your nose is peeling down fast like water on a snowy hill." 07/07/09
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"I'd be so fun there. [Chuck e. Cheese's]" 06/27/09
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"You think I should be a piano player or speak bird?" 06/11/09
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"Mom, with those glasses you look like a nanny or not my mom." 06/11/09
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"Mom, maybe we should go through the whole town and find a boy that's not married and get him to marry you. We can start tomorrow just asking every boy I see." 05/25/09
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"Sometimes when other people are talking about me I just act normal." 04/28/09
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"If I were a pirate I'd take a umbrella with me." 04/27/09
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“My mom has a egg ped because she has old feet with cracks like volcanoes.” 04/25/09
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"I know math; two plus two equals two plus two, I think." 04/25/09
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"Is this the first time you've had hot chocolate with a friend?" 04/15/09
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"I sure picked the right mom to snuggle with and kiss all the time." 04/13/09
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"Will, we gotta get a clue." 04/04/09
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"Don't give those [menus] to us, we can't read." 04/04/09
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Me- "Lucia, do you know the name of your school?" Lucia- "Payson Market." 04/04/09
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"Meow Meow usually listens to me. Sometimes she ignores me like Mc-Ignoring-Pants." 03/28/09
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"Just call him, Mr. Nobody-that-has-a-name." 03/19/09
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"Mommy if I wish on a star tonight I'm gonna wish I was Hannah Montana and I'm gonna wish you were a little bit taller." 03/30/09

It's past 2:00 a.m. and I'm avoiding going to bed. The thought popped into my head that I should be in bed and then another thought chimed in asking when is bedtime for adults. I have a pretty easy schedule right now, but does that mean I should stay up till all hours searching the cable and Internet tubes for anything to keep my interest and fight the grown-up voice saying it's time for bed? I could do that and then there are some not so fun consequences later.

Why do we fight limits? Especially when we know we have choices and certain choices limit one thing while gifting you extra things? I know I often resist for no other reason than to fight back against...against what? against my own possibilities?

No more resistance for tonight. I'll learn some new lessons tomorrow. I do love my bed, and it's time to show it! ;)

Dear Lee-lu-bee, Boo-sha-boo, Love bug, Bug, Luc, Cia, Bug-a-boo, Baby girl:

I've begun this letter many times and for some reason my computer keeps eating my words. So, perhaps it's best I keep this simple and post before this special day is technically ended. After all, there are no accidents.

I have been blessed to have more time with you this past year. It's been a challenge at times. However, there is nothing that would replace the light you are in my heart. You are my joy. Thank you for making me a mom.

Love,

Momma

It's beyond time to get back to doing what I like and what I do well. I've been holding back from moving forward in fear that I couldn't find one job I wanted to do for the rest of my life. So the things I'm good at won't win me any awards, no throngs of scholars will show up at my funeral, no one will be clambering to be me. I'm still a great person. I have felt twinges of failure when I look at my grandmother's life. The thing is I like me, and the lack of degrees and prestige don't inhibit me from enjoying life. So, I'm taking the grains of truth and letting the rest of the baggage I took on fall to the ground.

In this time of not working I've been wracking my brain to think of that one job that would fulfill me even on the days when it was hard and not just the fun days. Except I already have that job. I'm a mom. I remember many years ago thinking I didn't want to stay home. I liked work. I assumed I'd like a break during the day. Now granted there were times once I became a mom that I counted myself as blessed to have great people watching my daughter while I worked. What I didn't plan on was the deep sense of missed time. Working full-time and then only having three hours a day during the week to be with Lucia was frustrating.

Recently I surprised myself when I realized really wanted to be a mom that stayed home. I can't though being a single parent. Saying I can't stay home isn't totally true. I could choose to live with my parents and not work. However, it would be a burden on them and it would have other consequences as well.

I know I have a choice and I'm choosing to go back to work, take some classes, and be a better mom. The quality of time I spend as a mom is important. Tonight Lucia asked me to keep tickling and playing with her. It was fifteen minutes of fun I think she'll hold as a happy memory of us.

This is my second time using iMovie and I have improved so very much. I took some more video of Lucia dancing. This time it was in a restaurant, with a small audience. This is my lovebug!\

Lucia has loved music from a very young age. She would bounce in time when she was old enough to sit up. A certain auntie taught her to shake her booty after she had just learned to walk. She will rock out in the car, but she loves dancing. Lately she's been dancing every day. Here is a short video of her and Will dancing today. Keep in mind I have no idea how to edit so this is not a quality video. I'll be working to learn to edit so I can have more video memories of Lucia's dancing.

I'd love to use this while driving...



Via CuriosityShoppeOnline.com

This weekend Lucia was doing homework. The pages she has currently have quite a bit of coloring and she gets bored after a bit. So, I offered to put on some music. Her choice? Jefferson Starship's We Built This City. If it works it's fine with me.

I've been behind on updating my blog with quotes from Lucia. Thankfully I type them into a note on my phone so I don't forget or lose them in a pile of miscellaneous papers which is my bedroom some days. I'm going to edit how I add them to my blog as well because I think about these things and stay up organizing in my head. Yes, it's exhausting to be me.

09/19/09 "Mom, the air is my soap."

09/09/09 "Don't worry about a thing, 'cause every little mom is gonna be alright."

09/06/09 Lucia: "Will, did you know my mom is cute?"

Will: "Oh, but I'm cute."


09/04/09 "Will, vampires are nice to each other."

08/30/09 Me: "Lucia, you're clapping too loud."

Lucia: "I'm just clapping the words to the song."



08/29/09 "I don't actually sleep unless I'm asleep."

08/29/09 (Zen, the dog, is enthusiastically licking her arm.) "Do you like me as a popsicle?"

07/24/09 "Me and Will made a deal that I will protect him, even if I'm not there."



07/07/09 "Mom, did you know I'm a small, rude alien? I just hafta pretend I'm a kid.

This state in which I live, Utah, is breathtaking with it's diversity of landscapes. However, the diversity of people is overwhelmingly strangled by a powerful and loud group. I call this group the High and Mighty Utah Mormon Republicans.

Mind you I know that not all Mormons, not all Republicans, and not all Mormons who vote Republican are in this group. I'm referring to a sort of collective of the most closed-minded, over-bearing, and suffocating people who sway public and private laws as they choose and defend themselves with religion or the constitution. What strikes me as ironic is that the same methods of justification they use are the ones that say we all have choices and not even the high and mighty can deny choices.

I was frustrated to learn that our school district would not be giving the school children a chance to listen to President Obama's speech to them this week. I received a letter via Lucia's principal that is from the Superintendent explaining why they made this choice, apologizing as well as stating they would show it to the children, and giving parents a chance to refuse to have their children listen to the speech. Do we really need to have a parental consent form to not listen to the President of our country? Although I do agree there should be a choice I simply wonder what is the fear. Are people afraid the President of the United States of America will brainwash their children? Is there a precedence for fear of what the office of the President would say to children? I didn't always agree with former President Bush, but I certainly did not fear him or what he would have said to children.

I think it comes down to fear of change. Once we know there is going to be change it's as if some sort of defense mechanism is switched on in our mind. Yet, we rarely like the duldrum of a routine. Do we eat the same thing every day? Do we read only one book over and over? Do we wear the same clothes every day? I feel we thrive on change, sometimes more if we believe we are in control/making the choice. At least that's one theory.

To let you make your own choice I'm going to include some of the text from the letter. The paragraph previous summarized the President's message and the one following stated when the children would be able to watch the speech as well as an opportunity for parent's to choose to not have their children participate.

"Nebo District received official word on September 2, 2009, announcing President Obama's back-to-school message to school children. The information we received said, 'The decision to watch (or not to watch) the President's speech should be made by each district. There is no requirement from the Utah State Office of Education, the U.S. Department of Education, or from the President that any student watch.' Given limited information and the timing of the announcement of the President's speech, Nebo District decided that district students would not participate in watching this speech live at school.

In hindsight, we realize that this decision may not have been the best one possible and may have sent a message to students and patrons that we do not respect the office of the President. This was never our intent. We also realize that this decision denied students, who were interested, the opportunity to participate in this live historic event. We regret that our decision had this affect.; While we cannot turn back the clock, we desire to make this opportunity available to our students."

I do agree that the notification should have been given further in advance and more of the content should have been revealed. Thankfully there are always ways to learn from a decision, good or bad. I am glad the school district is giving the children a chance to hear the speech.

Please note that this post contains opinions and feelings held by me and may not be held by others for whatever reason.

I'm emotional. Not all the time, but it's often just under the surface until something pierces my defenses. I suppose I don't have the thickest of defenses. However, I'm okay with my defenses and my emotions because I can acknowledge feelings and then accept responsibility for my choices following.

Before I get more off tangent I'm going to go back to a Friday night. Kari, Will, Lucia, and I are driving from the Covey Arts Center in Provo to Noodles & Co. when I slip into a role of pointing out things to the kids in order to keep them in a good mood and perhaps teach them about their surroundings. The road curves and I see the familiar sign for The Mending Shed. "Lucia and Will look at the wood on that building. Do you know where that wood came from?" I stop. I can't say it because the tears are welling in my eyes and I'm the driver. Kari looks over at me and steps in to explain that the wood came from their Great Great Grandpa Huntsman's farm in Idaho.

When I visited my sisters Keeley and Alex in Kanab this March I started to cry for how happy I was to have this chance to hang out in the kitchen chatting and playing with the kids or the animals talking and talking and talking. I stay up late whenever they come to visit. I tell them every new story I have- and a few they've heard before. I cry when I hug them a little longer and a little tighter and tell them I love them.

For Mother's Day Lucia gave me a card where (with a little help) she had written, "I love you!" It was so sweet and of course tears welled up. However, I accept that I'm emotional and moved to tears at times. I just might stock up on tissues though.

Lucia: Will, do you want to be big and strong to drive big trucks? Then you have to eat this hash brown.

Will: I just want to drive a police car and take all those bad guys to jail.

6:00 a.m. is a magical time, for those who are awake. I decided to stay up all night. I have been in a poor sleeping pattern and decided to break it in an unusual way. It also helped to be caught up in a TV series on Hulu.

Now to keep myself awake I decided to do some laundry, put away some toys, and generally stay busy quietly lest I wake Lucia. The most wonderful part...no pants. I know, I know, but you should try it once. My sister Alex told me when no one was home she loved to walk around the house with no pants- she still wore a shirt and underwear, just no pants. I've done it a few times out of laziness like when the pants I want to wear are in the dryer and I don't want to put on pants only to take them off in less than twenty seconds.

Nothing amazing happened. It was simply silly, fun, and liberating. I do wear pants to breakfast though so now it's time to don those magical trousers.

I want a nap.

I was awakened at night. I was awakened by hope, hope that I could smell and taste. Yet as I rushed through the night I found I was betrayed. I returned defeated having found the hope was lying in ruins after being consumed by another. Farewell beloved corn bread pudding leftovers, until you return again, farewell.

Alton Brown's Sweet Corn Bread Pudding (of dreams)

Childhood myths are one of those things that sometimes follow you even into adulthood. Sometimes they are things you misunderstood or perhaps simple teasing that you fall for and never quite shake. The ones that stayed with me the longest are as follows.

Sizzler - I remember at least once driving past a Sizzler and asking my mom if we could go there to eat. She told me it was too expensive. So, I spent many years believing only rich people ate at Sizzler.

Oatmeal - I heard someone once say that oatmeal sticks to your ribs. I believed that when I swallowed oatmeal it lined the inside of my ribs. Obviously the mechanics of that improbability did not occur to me at the time.

I'm sure I'm creating new ones for my daughter.

I was in my parent's kitchen tonight holding my precious niece, Sophie, as she molded her tiny body in complete comfort and trustful slumber and I could no longer hold in my tears. This past week has been so full of love. No monumental events occurred that might find themselves told on a movie screen. Something more amazing than any camera could capture- life!

I will cry more in the next twelve hours but it is not all tears of sorrow. I am so blessed, so grateful, so loved. On this day for mothers I acknowledge the strength of the women in my heart.

If the sky that we look upon
Should tumble and fall
And the mountains should crumble to the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry, no I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

If there were a record player for my heart it would be this song. I know I will cry. However, I know I will not cry alone because my mom, my sisters, and our daughters will be the strength we are to each other.



Photo by Wade Haskell

I've already told my mom I want an adjustable crescent wrench and a socket set for my birthday. If my sisters want to get me something fun I have a suggestion:

Harold and Maude print via Etsy

I am sitting on the sidewalk drawing with chalk when I am approached by my nephew, Will.

Will: M, what is that?

M: It's a flag, Willie. It's the flag for Sweden.

Will: Oh.

M: You're part Swedish, Will.

Will: Yeah, but I'm funny.

Yes, you are Will.

Lucia has had an interest in stories about the people in her life for quite some time. It started when she would be not ready to go to sleep and I was too tired to read a story. I would scramble for stories from my memory that she would find funny. Her top three stories are the time Kari fell asleep behind a door, when raccoons got into our trash, and me peeing in my Grandpa Huntsman's car.

Yesterday she wanted me to tell the story of me peeing in the car to my good friend Charlotte. For those of you dying to know the details, here is the story. I must have been about four. My Grandpa Huntsman used to pick up me, Kari, and Britta for short visits. We usually ended up at a place with hamburgers and shakes. I don't know where we were going, but we were in the car and I had to go to the bathroom. He brushed it off as not an emergency. My Grandpa hated stopping for potty breaks. He liked to drive and not have stops. He dismissed my second request to stop for a bathroom break. When he failed again to stop I said, "Grandpa, I'm warning you." He didn't heed my warning. I ended up peeing on the car seat.

He found this story very funny. He even threatened to tell my husband someday. The story is still funny and a bit embarrassing for me. However, now it's also a little sad. He passed away almost four years ago. I won't get to see his face light up as he prepares to embarrass me. I know I'll have to tell it myself. In my mind I'll be picturing him in a Dickie's jumpsuit, cowboy boots, and a cabby cap laughing.

I have added a new feature to my blog entitled, "Excerpts from Lucia." I am not great at writing down the funny things she says in order to save them. Now I can add them here and back them up for present and future amusement.

I said goodbye today. I said goodbye and I cried. I cried and she rejoiced.

I gave notice to Lucia’s daycare today that I was dropping- I wouldn’t be bringing her there again. I started to cry a bit when I told Lucia. She was so excited, and I was so hurt over that one decision. I started crying a bit when I told the administrator and her teachers. I picked up her things from her cubbyhole and I cried a bit as I handed her teacher the empty bin. I got into my car and I knew I wasn’t done crying, but I needed to drive home.

So now I’m giving myself permission to cry and talk myself through why I feel this breakdown. I’m not an organized person when it comes to myself and especially not money. Money is emotional to me. I know I frustrate those around me with my poor choices. I have had enough experiences to scare some people, but not me. I’m just so stubborn. Along the way I have made some smart choices and I give myself credit for those. I find myself again in a position of setting financial goals and failing…miserably.

Certain things are mostly out of my control- such as not being able to get a new job. This frustrates me because it means I have to give up more of my stubbornness than I want to right now. I want to hold onto that stubborn/prideful/choice and prove everyone wrong who ever judged me and judged me as a failure.

Another thing out of my control is my goal to be able to live on my own and support Lucia and myself. I set a goal to be out of my parent’s house and be in an apartment. Then I set a goal to be in a house. The road to a house was a long journey and it’s longer from where I sit crying and wanting to beat myself up until I beat every stubborn, stupid part of my soul out forever.

I ask myself why Lucia is happy with this change. She wants to spend more time with me. Why does she want to be with me? I am not a very good mom. Why does she love me? Because she’s mine and I’m hers.

Instead of being the victim and the sob story and the family screw-up I am creating something better. I don’t have a job right now. Okay. Thankfully I have family. I can’t afford to send Lucia to a pre-school right now. Okay. I do have resources to learn how to teach her and prepare her for kindergarten. I’m not great at spending as much quality time with her as I am able. Okay. I put down the computer and we do something together.

This mish-mash of ideas and feelings and failures and successes is me. I’m not letting down anyone as much as I am myself. I am strong, creative, beautiful, loving, fun, and supportive. I will improve myself by creating the self I am proud to be.

The excitement surrounding our 44th, President Barack H. Obama, has remained strong for me. Perhaps the fever is more like that of celebrity. However, I find the fever intoxicating and full of hope. I even went as far as making my own Obamicon!

Here's a list of people on Twitter from Sara Frere Jones:

people who are just back from a really awesome run
people who are involved with "computers"
DJs
DJs at the airport
DJs who are drunk
people who don't seem to have anyone else's email address
people who are mad at the TV sets
people who have forgotten how to use email
people who have forgotten how to text
people who are involved in "social networking" and optimizing the power of re-Tweeting and "computers"
people who can't find a reasonable picture of themselves
people who really like the news
DJs at the airport
people who are hungry
rappers
people who are cold
people who are back from an OK run
people who can't figure out what their kids want to eat
Shaquille O'Neal
people who have never seen snow
Rachel Maddow
forty-five people I've never heard of who all invented the internet
people who are concerned about the collapse of the publishing industry
people who like Battlestar Galactica
rappers who are eating food
people who are about to go for a run
DJs who want to know where you are
people who are mad at Twitter
a nun

Cows With Names Make More Milk

"If you call a cow by name, it indicates that perhaps you talk to her more, perhaps you consider her more of an individual, perhaps you have more of a one-to-one relationship," said Douglas, who has seen firsthand the consequences of stress in a cow. "Personally, I have had a black eye and broken ribs from milking."

"We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing can withstand the power of millions of voices calling for change.

We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics who will only grow louder and more dissonant in the weeks to come. We've been asked to pause for a reality check. We've been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope. For when we have faced down impossible odds; when we've been told that we're not ready, or that we shouldn't try, or that we can't, generations of Americans have responded with a simple creed that sums up the spirit of a people.

Yes we can."

President Barack Hussein Obama

Via SnorgTees.com

Last TBTL golden nugget for today...wait for it...TINY HOUSES! I can picture my sister Keeley, her husband Will, and their whippet Lola living in the Lusby model. Mind you they'd need a truck that *cough* wasn't cursed a.k.a. worked reliably.

I like the Z-Glass model. However, I would like to put two of them together to have at least two bedrooms. The Harbinger model has less square feet, but room for two beds. I'd most likely end up at Ikea designing the best possible storage arrangements. I would then upgrade to a walk-in tub with a shower curtain or one of these fancy showers.

I came across this lovely video while catching up on Too Beautiful To Live's blog. Once upon a time I was a theater geek. The bond lives on...somewhere deep inside...my mind.

I heard a reference to these lyrics on a podcast of Too Beautiful To Live when the producer, Jen Andrews, had written a rap to cheer up someone. I kept forgetting to look up the entire song until yesterday when I felt as though hope had buoyed me up if not to just keep my head up.

Anthem by Leonard Cohen

The birds they sang
at the break of day
Start again
I heard them say
Don't dwell on what
has passed away
or what is yet to be.

There is a crack, a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.

As though I needed another reason to adore Eddie Izzard!

Izzard Gives Private Performance to Terror Victim

Via Jason Kottke

I have had spent quite a bit of time browsing the myriad of lovely things on Etsy. I even purchased several Christmas presents that all turned out to be received with great success. Here are a several things I adore:

Magnets

Harold and Maude finger-puppets

Bags

Prints

Jewelery, Jewelery, Jewelery!

NOT these items

"For what it’s worth, it’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit... start whenever you want... you can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that stop you. I hope you feel things that you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life that you’re proud of and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again."

~The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

1. Link the person(s) who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. Tell about five unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag five bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on their blogs to let them know they've been tagged.

I was tagged by myself after seeing this on Jessikuh's blog.

So, five quirks about me...

1. I can't stand to leave the house without wearing earrings. It really throws off my whole day.
2. I am a devoted Chevrolet fan (because growing up my dad said they were the best trucks) to the point that even if there was a Ford more affordable than a Chevy I might have a semi-nervous breakdown trying to decide which vehicle to purchase.
3. I have conversations with myself, out loud, where I get to say clever things that will impress others.
4. I still dream of meeting Paul McCartney.
5. I would only get a tattoo for my sisters.

I tag Kari, Britta, Sue, Colt and/or Maggie, and Charlotte!

Thanks to Skype my family in Utah was able to make a video call to my sister, brother-in-law, and niece in Pennsylvania. The video quality was very nice and with a great Internet connection it was almost like being in the same room. Thank you Skype for making this Christmas special!

My top five podcast choices, and why I listen:

How Much Do We Love
~Positive, random, humor, Sara Davis, and Rob Lindley

Too Beautiful To Live
~Luke Burbank




Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me
~Paula Poundstone, random news

This American Life
~Random stories that show the connections in life

Stuff You Missed In History Class
~Truth and history class have an intervention

The Plug is worth a visit if you enjoy a bit of humor. Here are two sections I enjoy:

Signs of Boredom: A Journal To Learn From

Stranger Photos Have Happened

As I sit and type these words I realize more and more how pieces of life are un-seemingly connected. I have found this truth in people every day. Now I find it in a logical location, but one that caught me off guard.

I came to the library today in search of knowledge, tools, and skills to add to my life. I believe I have these in some form yet to my detriment I am often too stubborn to act. I have been to enough therapy that I can give a new therapist a detailed overview of my issues. The one thing I lack again and again is action.

Last night I saw myself parenting in a way I was saddened to see. I realized I was enabling many of the issues with my four-year old daughter. My failure to act until issues have escalated has rewarded me with much frustration.

Upon entering the library I searched the digital catalog for resumes, organization, and parenting. (Side Note - Sometimes I miss the feel and sound of the card catalog in those slender drawers.) The call numbers were 650 Resumes, 640 Organization, and 649 Parenting. Who would have thought that business writing, organization, and parenting would be categorized so closely together. Yet it makes sense when you look for the connections; structure, routine, and attitude.

I also found the books I picked up to be telling. I am very obviously drawn to titles. Here is the list in the order I found them:

The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Managing Your Time
The Single Mother’s Book
The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Decluttering
Scream Free Parenting
Landing On The Right Side Of Your Ass: A Survival Guide For The Recently Unemployed
Dancing Naked: Breaking Through the Emotional Limits that Keep You from the Job You Want

I have yet to open any of the books. However, I am open to the possibilities of what I can learn. Then I act. Inside I want a nap though.

It's my mom's birthday today! However, she is having fun, fun, fun with Britta and family in Pennsylvania. I am in Utah. I am in her house right now. I am taking care of her garden.

I miss my mom, but how can I feel jealous of a sister who has never moved further than 20 minutes from home. I appreciate my mom more and more as I struggle and succeed and struggle as a mom myself. Thank you mom for so many things I plan to tell you when you come back.

My friend, Jill, sent me the following e-mail and I pass it on just in case others would benefit:

Law of the Garbage Truck

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. He was really friendly.

So I asked, 'Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so...Love the people who treat you right. Pray for the ones who don't.

Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it!

My sister, Britta, turns 30 today. Britta is amazing, and if you want proof read her blog. She truly inspires me to believe in myself and to never settle. Love you, Britt!

Don't Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford

Alternative method of harnessing power...gone too far?

Thank you, Jordan, for reminding me that even admist the darkness one candle can give hope.

Today, I am thankful for:

Lucia
Sisters
Family
Water
Cell phones
Keys
Beds
Washing machines and dryers
Plants
Fly swatters
People who remind me of hope - Jordan -
Nieces and nephews
Pink
LOL cats
Summer squash
Therapy
True friends
Showers
Soap
Being someone's momma
Being a woman
The slinky of life

Passive aggressiveness at its best



Via Jake of the Web from Radio From Hell

It's not such a small world after all



Via Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!

Tank Chair



via Radio From Hell

Chocolate cravings caused by bacteria

"Finding Nemo's Cousin"

Creative breast cancer merchandise



Via Radio From Hell

"Cat sets fire; dog rescues owner"



Via Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me

"New face of vandalism?"



Via Radio From Hell

"New face of vandalism?"



Via Radio From Hell

"Roombas fill an emotional vacuum for owners"




Via NPR's Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!

Photo Blog

You mean Kraft isn't the only way to make Macaroni and Cheese?

Flip Flop Flyin' - Lollipops



via Dooce

iGoogle

I wonder if this conflicts with Merlin Mann's Inbox Zero?

Ever wanted to know the name for the # sign?

Symbols.com

Like eBay for food...Fizook it!

Dial a human

Via Jake of the Web on X96's Radio From Hell

"Breed Of Double-Nosed Dogs Found"














Via Susan

Ionic wind

"Chatroom warning after web death"

"Monkeys, Humans tie in memory game" (Discovery.com)

Free Text Messaging

Chore Wars

Thanks to "Jake of the Web" on the Radio From Hell show blog 09/04/07

"Mommy, I don't need a tissue. I can just eat my boogers."

-Lucia, 2 11/12 yrs old, 05/07/07

"It's dollars and scents as liquor store uses aroma of lawn-cutting to sell beer"

Via Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!

Ice cream aids fertility?

"Incarnation of Wordsworth"

Cube Door

12 Sided Calendar

Photography magazine

"Graceland finally embraces Elvis impersonaters"

wii tracker

What is "noodling" and is it legal?

Ever wanted a door for your cubicle?

Want to be able to listen to radio online? Find out how to contact your state representative.

At www.fakebuddy.com nobody cares if you stink and are socially inept!
This site is free, fun, and hilarious!

You can choose your own buddy and form a serious bond with a completey fake person!
Go see what you are missing at:

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Brian Eno

I headed into the restroom today on my way back from actually leaving the office for lunch. Right behind me is a woman from the one other office on our floor. I have this thing about the handicap sized stall so I bee line for it that stall. As I sit down I wonder if everyone lets their pants and underwear fall to the floor or if some do the half way thing. As this is going on in my head the woman in the stall next to me has one of those little farts. You know, the ones where your body is relaxed in order to relieve yourself and some how there was some air just waiting. Probably because there are people who tend to hold it in and then there are those who just let it rip. I almost wished I could will myself to fart just to make sure that lady didn't feel embarrassed. Of course, we are in a bathroom and this is what happens, right? I always feel bad if I do something stinky in the bathroom. Thankfully all the girls contribute air sprays or body sprays to freshen up the room. So, my fellow restroom associates- just know you can fart whenever you want and I won't judge you.

Light bulbs that save money, but may poison you with mercury

Who invented Sudoku?

Do you want to know what is inside your colon? Look!

Monster Toad

Lock Bumping

Talking Cameras

Dreamed up phone number leads man to a bride

Grand Canyon Skywalk

Rasterbator

Random Kitten Generator

RawConfessions - You can confess and/or comment on someone's confession

"Do the Benefits of Recycling Outweigh the Costs?"

Tips for traveling with kids

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

Become An M&M

"Over the course of six months, reporter and This American Life contributor Jack Hitt followed a group of inmates in a high security prison, as they rehearsed and staged a production of the last act--Act V--of Shakespeare's Hamlet. Shakespeare may seem an odd match for a group of hardened criminals, but he found that they understand the bard on a level most of us might not. It's a play about murder and its consequences, performed by murderers, living out the consequences."