Until I find an awesome way to archive the gems that come from my child I'm posting some of them here to archive and make room for more.


"Mom, sometime will you show me some of your moves of water?" 07/09/09
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"Mom, I can hear your breathing from in between your boobs." 07/09/09
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"Holy guacamole your nose is peeling down fast like water on a snowy hill." 07/07/09
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"I'd be so fun there. [Chuck e. Cheese's]" 06/27/09
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"You think I should be a piano player or speak bird?" 06/11/09
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"Mom, with those glasses you look like a nanny or not my mom." 06/11/09
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"Mom, maybe we should go through the whole town and find a boy that's not married and get him to marry you. We can start tomorrow just asking every boy I see." 05/25/09
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"Sometimes when other people are talking about me I just act normal." 04/28/09
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"If I were a pirate I'd take a umbrella with me." 04/27/09
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“My mom has a egg ped because she has old feet with cracks like volcanoes.” 04/25/09
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"I know math; two plus two equals two plus two, I think." 04/25/09
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"Is this the first time you've had hot chocolate with a friend?" 04/15/09
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"I sure picked the right mom to snuggle with and kiss all the time." 04/13/09
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"Will, we gotta get a clue." 04/04/09
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"Don't give those [menus] to us, we can't read." 04/04/09
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Me- "Lucia, do you know the name of your school?" Lucia- "Payson Market." 04/04/09
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"Meow Meow usually listens to me. Sometimes she ignores me like Mc-Ignoring-Pants." 03/28/09
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"Just call him, Mr. Nobody-that-has-a-name." 03/19/09
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"Mommy if I wish on a star tonight I'm gonna wish I was Hannah Montana and I'm gonna wish you were a little bit taller." 03/30/09

It's past 2:00 a.m. and I'm avoiding going to bed. The thought popped into my head that I should be in bed and then another thought chimed in asking when is bedtime for adults. I have a pretty easy schedule right now, but does that mean I should stay up till all hours searching the cable and Internet tubes for anything to keep my interest and fight the grown-up voice saying it's time for bed? I could do that and then there are some not so fun consequences later.

Why do we fight limits? Especially when we know we have choices and certain choices limit one thing while gifting you extra things? I know I often resist for no other reason than to fight back against...against what? against my own possibilities?

No more resistance for tonight. I'll learn some new lessons tomorrow. I do love my bed, and it's time to show it! ;)

Dear Lee-lu-bee, Boo-sha-boo, Love bug, Bug, Luc, Cia, Bug-a-boo, Baby girl:

I've begun this letter many times and for some reason my computer keeps eating my words. So, perhaps it's best I keep this simple and post before this special day is technically ended. After all, there are no accidents.

I have been blessed to have more time with you this past year. It's been a challenge at times. However, there is nothing that would replace the light you are in my heart. You are my joy. Thank you for making me a mom.

Love,

Momma

It's beyond time to get back to doing what I like and what I do well. I've been holding back from moving forward in fear that I couldn't find one job I wanted to do for the rest of my life. So the things I'm good at won't win me any awards, no throngs of scholars will show up at my funeral, no one will be clambering to be me. I'm still a great person. I have felt twinges of failure when I look at my grandmother's life. The thing is I like me, and the lack of degrees and prestige don't inhibit me from enjoying life. So, I'm taking the grains of truth and letting the rest of the baggage I took on fall to the ground.

In this time of not working I've been wracking my brain to think of that one job that would fulfill me even on the days when it was hard and not just the fun days. Except I already have that job. I'm a mom. I remember many years ago thinking I didn't want to stay home. I liked work. I assumed I'd like a break during the day. Now granted there were times once I became a mom that I counted myself as blessed to have great people watching my daughter while I worked. What I didn't plan on was the deep sense of missed time. Working full-time and then only having three hours a day during the week to be with Lucia was frustrating.

Recently I surprised myself when I realized really wanted to be a mom that stayed home. I can't though being a single parent. Saying I can't stay home isn't totally true. I could choose to live with my parents and not work. However, it would be a burden on them and it would have other consequences as well.

I know I have a choice and I'm choosing to go back to work, take some classes, and be a better mom. The quality of time I spend as a mom is important. Tonight Lucia asked me to keep tickling and playing with her. It was fifteen minutes of fun I think she'll hold as a happy memory of us.